zeldathemes
confidence is key

14 Katy. Half homo. Half mermaid. singer songwriter pianist. Mainly humor with a splash of fandoms. im funny like 3% of the time so beware



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What's the most illegal thing you ever did?

Anonymous

sephyerite:

almanzapedia:

At Stanford there was this Professor who was a total bitch and she taught British Literature, which was cool. Except she taught only her opinions of the books and it didn’t help me as a writer. I went to school to learn new things to improve my craft, not have someone else’s opinions carved onto my forehead.

So anyway, for our final project, she asked us to write a ten page paper on why the color symbolism in Othello was so significant. I did some research and it turned out that she did her entire graduate thesis on this very subject. I was mad. This wasn’t teaching, this was boosting her ego. SO I wrote a ten page essay on why color symbolism in Othello wasn’t significant, satirizing it to the point of no return, saying that her opinion was an opinion and shouldn’t be taken seriously.

SHe failed me, needless to say. So in retaliation, I responded by baking a batch of brownies laced with weed and laxatives and delivered them myself to the professor hours before her big graduation speech. I told her that it was a peace offering, my way of apologizing and asking if I could do anything to fix my grade.

She refused to fix my grade.

In the end, she shit herself on stage.

I didn’t regret it.

No mercy.

nostalgiaultra:

Me in the party: Gosh golly! This beat is… Whoo! This beat is… DANDY!

muslimmafia:

my grandfather always had candy in his pockets, and one time when I got really sick and I was hospitalized my dad told him not to give me any candy. He pulled out his pockets to show he hadn’t even brought any and I got really sad but as soon as my dad walked out of the room he then proceeded to take off his hat and had 2 chewy chocolate candy toffees and 2 orange fanta toffees, and I’ll never forget the happiness and surprise I felt in that one moment in my entire life.

Patience: A Spell Jar

lavenderwrath:

  • jar
  • bay leaf
  • black pepper
  • fennel seed
  • lavender 
  • peppermint

Combine ingredients in jar as desired. Keep near your bed or desk. Whichever place you spend more time.

theheirsofdurin:

cybersyncing said: ok but hear me out: The Hobbit where everything is the same except Bilbo has the personality of Martin Freeman

preparetobemildlyentertained:

lalalacoco:

so guys i was trying to cheer someone up with harry potter memes and i found some really good ones

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like seriously

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look at these

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i feel like i just relived 2008

giggleswan:

Get your killer heels, sneakers, pumps, or lace up your boots
Representin’ all the women, salute, salute

uni-t-e-a:

human:

wtf did i just watch

AMAZING

vinebox:

shouldnt:

rainbowsandfood:

Literally my favorite vine of all time

this is me

pce luv tacos

operameister:

thisismythanksgivingurl-gobble:

agentgreenfishy:

poselikeateam:

fuck-i-just:

Next time a blocked number calls you answer like this: “Jim’s whore house. You got the dough, we got the hoe.”

Why does this not have any notes?

lol no “Nashville sperm bank, you squeeze it we freeze it. how may I help you?”

“Henderson’s Morgue, you stab em, we slab em, this is Eight Ball speaking.”

“Texas crematorium you kill ‘em we grill ‘em how can I direct your call?”

sixpenceee:

Cabinet of Monstrosities by Hajime Emoto. They are supposed to represent the 7 deadly sins. 

These were all made from paper and bamboo. Here is his website, although it’s in Japanese. (Website)

doriimer:

cardigans + jackets + blazers 

unregistered-hypercam2:

kittykhole:

fat cat running

look at him… look at how deliberate each step and movement is. look at how mathematically perfect that 90 degree corner turn was… this cat is on another level far beyond us all

unregistered-hypercam2:

kittykhole:

fat cat running

look at him… look at how deliberate each step and movement is. look at how mathematically perfect that 90 degree corner turn was… this cat is on another level far beyond us all